Ketchum Likened to ‘Wild Africa’ During Presidents Week
Cougars — identified as older, sexually aggressive women — attacked several young men over the busy holiday, according to Ketchum PD; local group provided safari tours to public.
Tela
Gary is best friends with Tela. Gary enjoys writing.
Pluto
ICE Makes Serious Mistake Trying to Detain U.S. Women’s Hockey Team in Milan-Cortina
Five ICE agents were sent to the hospital with injuries including broken noses, missing teeth and “remarkable slashing wounds” after they tried to detain the team for carrying what they described as weapons such as “big sticks and skate blades as sharp as knives.”
Trump Demands NFL Kickoffs Include Real Lions and Bears for More Manliness, Death
Directive is aimed at alleviating president’s desperate feelings of inadequacy as a man; Former NFL linebacker to Trump: “I have pet lions that would love to play with you.”
Tennis Ball in Frozen Pond is Driving Golden Retriever Nuts
Owsley, a 3-year-old golden retriever from Ketchum, said he’s “convinced” that a tennis ball visible through the clear ice of a frozen pond near his home is “actually a demon trying to make me lose my [expletive] mind.”
Recent Retiree To Hold Morning ‘Power Meetings’ in Lookout Lodge
Former investment banker and Connecticut transplant Bill Thomas simply cannot relax; his wife says he needs purpose to fuel his tireless work ethic, maintain a rigid routine and boss people around.
BREAKING: SEAL Team 11 Makes Landfall in Greenland Invasion
Members of the 45th Mechanized Penguin Brigade secured beachheads ahead of the seals’ landfall.
ICE Agent Shoots Puppy Over Fear of Attack, Failure to Produce Papers
Agents say puppy was aggressive and they feared for their lives; Trump to honor agent during White House ceremony Saturday evening.
Thank You For Everything, Bobby. Eternal Love and Gratitude. RIP, NFA
For more than 30 years Robert Weir and the Grateful Dead have been a central part of my life on many levels. I am brokenhearted but also full of love and gratitude. Enjoy your trip, Bobby. Not fade away.
Man Gets Into Fight With ChatGPT in Ketchum Java
An argument about the alleged control that billionaire Trump donors have over AI escalated to shouting, screaming, a broken iPad, crying, apologies to staff and patrons and a chocolate croissant to go.