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For 250 years, this great nation has cherished and valued nurses and teachers.
Both professions are widely recognized as essential to brain development and not dying. In return, they have been compensated with low pay and diminishing benefits, because America.
During the Freedom 250 celebration in Washington, D.C., on July 4, nurses and teachers will be officially crowned the two most underpaid, undervalued professions in U.S. history.
Nurses have long demonstrated a willingness to disregard their own health and well-being for the sake of others. That selflessness was on full display during the COVID-19 pandemic, when they made tremendous sacrifices and risked their lives daily to help total strangers in need of lifesaving medical care.
St. Luke’s administrators, however, do not recall nurses working during the pandemic, which claimed the lives of more than a thousand nurses nationally by the time it was all over.
Ron Vacation, a manager for St. Luke’s Wood River in Ketchum, was under the impression that nursing no longer involved actual human beings.
Vacation, who spends most of his workday searching online for his next vacation destination, could not be reached for comment because he was on vacation.
Hospital administrators maintain the mistreatment of nurses is the result of a simple misunderstanding.
“I’m not certain that Ron even knows we have nurses,” confirmed Vacation’s assistant, Cheryl Work, who has not taken a vacation of her own since 2007. “He thinks most of the hospital is run by AI and that our nurses are actually robots.
“He thinks I’m a robot.”
Work added that she is not a robot, yet.
Meanwhile, President Trump plans to address the nation’s teachers during the ceremony.
“For 250 years, teachers have scammed the public by pretending they actually know what they’re talking about,” the president said. “But other than abusing their power by brainwashing children into a liberal, communist-driven agenda and forcing them to engage in satanic rituals, what do they do?
“They encourage boys to become girls and girls to become boys because they want all of us to share just one bathroom — that’s what else they do.”
Trump added that Elon Musk shares his disdain for educators, leading to the creation of an xAI-funded fleet of robots that will soon replace human teachers altogether. The transition, he said, will result in far more efficient brainwashing tactics.
“These robots are going to teach only what Elon programs them to teach, and they will have the power to euthanize dissenters beginning in the first grade,” the president said, referring to Elon Musk, who will soon hold the position of “lord of learning,” a title he made up but insists on being called.
Studies indicate human teachers are vital to humanity, providing an essential foundation for learning, critical thinking, character building, problem-solving, creativity, self-reliance and not thinking like a robot.
“Teacher, smeacher,” the president added with a mouthful of a McDonald‘s Big Mac.
President Trump continues to test at a fourth-grade level in math, science and reading comprehension. His emotional regulation skills scored at a first-grade level.
